avatar is people

Äre you alright Cole?"Vanessa asked, staring at the books littering the coffee table .Books about

 aliens,witch craft,and secret societies

 books with silly psychedelic covers and triangles with eyes in them

Cole had grown a full beard and had begun drinking in the morning

eating garbage trolling the net for abductees and victims of mind control

the next day it would be another theory, he'd talk about antennas and transmissions, next it would be thoughts of possession and questions about faith.He even asked her if he should become a Catholic

all sorts of explanations for what he whisperingly referred to as "the ear thing"

and 'the eye thing"

she had spoken to his shrink who seemed crazier than Cole was,Cole's psychiatrist explained.
that
there were all sorts of tests being performed
and
Cole simply fit a demographic

it's about procuring a library of Thought Styles
so
"the New Way" could standardize
A.I. and Immersive technology

Cole ,the Dr. explained should be
excited to be part of "it"





"so Cole is a Guinea Pig? For whom?" she asked

"I didn't say I was sure " the shrink said....his eyes darting
his excitement now replaced by
what looked to Vanessa an awful lot  more like fear than anything one
might be 'excited to be part of"

 " don't call it being a Guinea Pig.
he's been selected for some reason....
targeted....some in his position call themselves Targeted Individuals
but that
all but declares victimhood.....and we need Cole to feel empowered don't we?"the doctor said
 it's been happening alot,alot more than you might think""he said softly  looking around the room as if they were in some spy movie,""it doesn't make sense that a schizophrenic would remember hallucinations in this way, nor that Sound and Vision come together

:...The patient. I mean Cole's recollections are story based,a true schizophrenics are not. a schizophrenic's affect is disorganized.
Cole is focused
and astute
something of an extrovert

...." last year I  saw a client  I also suspected was being mentored
Very state of the art. in fact
the way this client described
the Brain Link
the Co Conscious
was exhilarating.....

  The Dr. informed Vanessa that there have been a rash of "the ear thing" and 'the seeing thing' all over California and Oregon
The Dr mentioned that
Gang Stalking techniques are utilized to keep the "participant" quiet..

" chipping someone's nervous system is still in 'the grey area" of legality..."The Dr said..

"the Grey area?" Vanessa said

New Things  need a new Way ,the Dr. said
throughout history
"things" have been "driven round the block" by the civilian population.""Things"" it's really not a good idea to speak about....

'can you help him?"Vanessa asked

"His mentors will help him....
the New Way does not believe in Psychiatry...,"the Dr said

'what does this "new Way" believe in?" Vanessa asked, annoyed at the Drs."withholds"

"Oh ..they believe in many
things I don't understand,' the Dr said smiling than placing his finger to his lips...his other finger pointing to the phone

Vanessa got up to leave..Clearly.
this man was unwell himself
The dr.
stood and said
"A colleage of mine who treated several such patients was murdered. last year,in his home.I really don't feel comfortable treating Cole at this time"

"have you told Cole?About any of this?"Vanessa asked.

ÿou don't seem to understand",if I tell Cole I am telling Them"

you don't "mess with THEM"....

.Your ex boyfriend is esentially a rape victim.
mind rape..
but also a tape recorder.
and a Tv set...like I said...it's in the grey area...
of legality
it's Advanced Technology...
It's sometimes referred to as synthetic telepathy.Brain waves are read from..."

"Jesus Christ Dr. are  you telling me Cole has computer chips in his brain ,"she said grabbing her coat getting ready to leave,she had heard that most psychiatrists are crazier than their patients and was now assured this was so

"there's no need for computer chips.That's whats frightening ...
but it helps to have bio sensors..for the Immersive Reality stuff.
otherwise there is so much beaming and waves being tossed about that
in no time
one's mind becomes. Irradiated

nano
  .. no larger than a dendrite...truly a marvel of our time"

"good bye Dr"" she said."i think I am going to call some agencies..
if what you say is true
they might be able to help Cole get this stuff out of his system"

"oh dear..I wouldn't do that...  " the Dr said.."why they might just do the same to you poor girl..it's best Cole just believe
he's nuts or that the entire situation
is supernatural....

"He does ," Vanessa said


                                                                                  (2)






She drove from the office to her apartment
and began doing what Cole had been doing trolling the interent for answers.All she needed was 9 day old beard,a bathrobe and some books about demons and she'd BE Cole.

 what she found was interesting.And terrifying ,if it were true THEY were doing tests

earlier that week Cole had called her in the middle of the night explaining that he was being called upon by angels.And she had snapped at him.She felt bad about then ,worse about it now,she dialed his number and suprisingly he picked it up on it's first ring


'I'm in love he said"sounding happier than she had ever remembered him being
he explained to Nessa that he was communicating with his true companion through all time

that it happened to be a guy didnt matter,love was love

he had never felt this way before

their nervous systems "spoke"to each other

""Where did you meet?"she asked

"You wouldn't understand.We didnt actually meet""

"it's The ear thing right.the "possession"" thing"

"You wouldnt understand"

"actually Cole I think I might""

"how?'

############################################3######################################3

.Although he was right handed he had begun using his left hand more and more,he had to buy a pair of left handed scissors

if you have something to say say it my face Cole yelled
at the "voices"

it will spoil it.there's a suspension of disbelief factor at play here Evan Graphed.

can I meet you?in real life?

"whats so great about "real life" Cole?what have you done with real life.What's the world done with real life?"



having listened to what Nessa said
(call her Vanessa,actually don't call her at all Evan said)he couldn't get it out of his mind that this sense this interaction was some technological mind fuck.It took the dimension of his initial "spiritual connection" away.But than again this Evan wasn't always the "love interest" Cole made him out to be.
In fact Evan had kept him awake last night telling him to throw away all his money.

"there's a reason for everything,"Evan said

it wasn't always sound ,it was more like the pulsing.pitch.Like the white noise a giant pulsating fan made.
it was also changes.
to his mood and perceptions.
as if someone had removed the top of his skull and was playing various parts of his brain like a piano.
he wished the key was in only the pleasure centers of his mind
but it was a complicated piece Evan was playing
sometimes he felt like crying for no reason.
It was times like that when he felt like calling Dr.Ling and asking for an appointment or pills.
and all thoughts of being connected to Evan went away
he also had the feeling it wasnt always just Evan
in control
the feeling was different.
sometimes he felt like he was simply connected to his own mind.
or to a computer.
bits of him felt as if they were being taken in .and out and reconnected
every matter of thought was presented to him.various styles.
he could have sworn once that a woman had entered his consciousness
he had seen the movie avatar.where other people had the ability to ....

:stop it " Evan said,"to over analyze this is to destroy it"
"than destroy it"
"i can destroy you in about 7 minutes.drive you out of your mind ,perhaps for good.would you like that Cole?:
"no"he graphed.
that's not how it's done.we're not having a conversation.Do you understand?
"what do you want?"
that's not how it's done that's not how it's done ..than the odd not quite sound of a fan .of white noise.he instantly forgot about the entire situation,except that "it" could drive him mad in 7 minutes,he got on with his own dismal thoughts,that he had to clean up the living room,shave..always aware however that someone or something was reading him
"to over analyze it is to destroy it"
fuck you he thought.not at "it"
"we can't do that either"
He found himself shouting at the ceiling"shut up shut up shut up"
"now you sound like a mad man,which reminds me .you must find another psychiatrist and tell him you hear voices.we need it documented"
who needs it documented.who the fuck was he talking to,thinking to.
"stop it stop stop it "sounded something like a high pitched voice.not Evan but more electronic.augmented.followed by another lower pitched "vibration"that seemed to somehow calm his mind down
'go to a mental hospital go to a mental hospital" an even deeper pitch roared.
he stuck his hands to his ears ,rocking back and forth.
he wasn't in control of the "entity" he couldn't make it stop.,
he couldn't shut it off.
he pictured the rest of his life in a mad house.
He forced himself to stop rocking and go to the bathroom to shave.
He saw his face in the mirror drawn tight from the stress.
calm down calm down calm down he hummed to himself,dropping the razor.for one moment wanting to ..
he slashed water on his face.
the sound ,the pace,was slower.he found it soothing .as if his mind had begun responding to another frequency.a calming one
and suddenly he felt  as buoyant

"it's new Cole,"He heard the voice say,"we have to test this mother fucker for all it's worth,isn't that the way love is?"Isn't that the way it is with all new relationships.Especially when you're the bitch,Cole felt a sexual  sensationrun  through his body that was like...

"don't come yet bossman,we gotta get you to a mental hospital"

"why.I'm not crazy"

"dude,you be crazy.or you be dead"



############################################4###############################


1975

my mom and step dad used to go out to these parties..my mom was very good looking,...people dropped things for no reason when she was walked by..
.there were around 7 of us strag alongs .
we hung around in the lobbies of fancy apartments
.we all got to know each other.most of the parents were divorced .it was visiting day.weekends .every other weekend.





"my name is Veda,"the girl in the lobby said.I had seen her around other lobbies.she often wore a crown on her head or something shiney in her hair.I had seen her and her brother sit for 3 hours ,very still ,not saying a word
she was 7 if she was a day,"this is my brother Kit,He doesnt speak.He is magical.
we can communicate without words.some people can,it runs in families,I want you to run upstairs and get us cookies and soda,"
I told her we weren't allowed upstairs.And Kit began having a fit,
"see what you did?"she said,"now quick ,quick run upstairs and get us cookies and soda before something happens"

2011

"I'd like you to meet Evan" Veda said, offering me a drink,"and Kit,Remember Kit,he talks now .But sometimes he prefers the Old Way of speaking.Not the New Way "

"I was sort of expected to see you wearing a crown"I said sipping my wine,tasting something cinnamon and salty

"I am,and now ,so are you"she said,taking away my glass.

" Oh you don't know..it's very hush hush but everybody knows..Oh please tell me you don't know...well I can't say ,it's a thing they've been working on since the late 80's...tv darhling what do you think
I'm talking about ..the silicon valley BEFORE their was a silicon valley and every studio from here to France had a piece in it..now everyone says what what..we did what what," Megan says into the phone,more into the phone than to Barbara,a 5th choice friend for phone chats,"yes interneural interface,I won't explain it again", "
". Brad says I shouldnt talk about it but he talks of nothing else,I swear he keeps a monitor near our bed,he tracks this guy's every moveHe doesnt call him by name just Demon,"Mega says eating pieces of a fruitrollup Ash left near the sink,. ".I try to read it but you have to use a special headset and you have to be able to decipher things,and Brad said it could be dangerous getting into a mind like that,supposedly he has inroads or something with ..I don't know..forces or something?Adam.adam Parker ,the actor yes the adam parker uses the headset too..why?
"why because according to parker  Demon is like the demon himself  after all He is called Demon ,.sick sick sick and we're not talkin s-i-c- we're talking s-i-c-K with a big K...from what i hear."
" They assumed demon was dead,everyone was so damned paranoid back than remember how everyone acted at Shelly's bat Mitzvah ?1994.June,you remember,it was like a funeral,poor Shelly...Well this guy who they thought I dont know died or something like comes back.to LA' ..they supposedly never tried it again",Megan says "what do you mean never tried what again.Interneural interface,it's illegal"My god I'd have been better off talking to the maid Megan thought,reaching into the pantry for another fruit roll up.".. I assume half the actors working today use interneural interface.half of these people can't even read. but this guy, this demon, was like a test version and they drove him god damn nuts,he took all this speed and started like seeing shit or something with Parson Nilson of all people at the helm.Parson Nilson "she shouts into the phone hoping brenda can sense her eye roll,"he used to be in herman's hermits or something..anyway they just wanted to cover it up..they picked the wrong guy.who knew he was a speed freak. or a demon or whatever he is.
well demon it seems is writing a screenplay or something.but he doesnt know it was just some..acting device so people wouldnt need scripts or sight lines  or something.
"well brenda I assume it was for acting ,what else would it be for?"any  of course Demon  assumes it's like angels or devils and shit..well Harry took a picture of demon, drinking lemonaide at a starbucks.whats he look like not much i can tell you that much i was expecting horns or something the way they talk but lemonaide?at starbucks?..."

she puts the first page of nots for the treatment down

"Is that a better way to write it?notice no dactology no "otherment" affairs no nothing .Just Hollywood.and we both know there is no sinister side to hollywood"I smile,but the smile is tight  tardive dyskinesia,from the drugs,I was in four point restraint.another opening another show.
this was the 3rd hospital i've been in since my return to LA,
Macy Enty besides being an executive producer was also a dactologist,she had made the trip all the way up to olive View to see me"you know Macy,it's dem voices,dem voices just won't leave me alone"

"thats quite a pitch" Macy Enty
"do you think it rings true.or could with further rewrites?"I asked sarcastically,I wanted to ask the nurse to untie at least one of my limbs.But she tells the nurse to leave.Please
"the dramatic structure needs work,it is all over the place.
" this supposed schizophrenia has it's drawbacks i'm afraid .
i have a bit of a jump cut mind these days as you well know"
,i had sent several copies of Small life Video and wallhangings to Fox,Paramount and New line studios
"there's a plot in there somewhere," I say,"you just have to look for it"

"small life video and wallhangings,"she scoffed".Let me tell you just how small that life of yours can get"
"oh it is quite small enough thank you,"
"you just can't stop can you.it's not something you should be proud of.You're the one fucking it up.Not us,passive agressive,infantile,full of ENROT,you'd better watch your step
and perhapos those aural hallucinations of yours are something a bit higher than this nonsense pseudo science interneural whatever"
"yes,I do believe that is what you want me to believe/Your M.O,false what are they called Brackus?
she rubs my forehead,with ?tenderness,but i feel a laquered nail too"we're concerned is all,there is something in you that isnt quite right.and Adam knows things"
"you told me to write that shit!

(.you see i had been set up early on to be the KEY CREEP in the story a modern representation of everything that that Proxy wanted to get rid of.it was why i had gotten these notebooks to type up and puruse to find a consistant tone,why I was brought to LA,why my art was being shown..oh did it get lost .in this multitude of furnished pseudo madness.that every word contained in this blog and small life video and wallhangings as well as my previous facilitated outings running amuck in LA and previously philadelphia,key west and Miami were to create a biography of such degeneracy...an example ..)

(the point that i was dragging poor kim into the story again..that was all..it was discussed at intial meeting at the housecleaning division of proxy corp how i would somehow weave my family into what was to become a jumble of schizophrenic,antisocial conspiract theory horseshit,I was paid 17 dollars an hour to participate in this nonsense,a hefty sum,but the thought of going on now that I saw justy how far they wanted me to take the tumble was going,not to mention the ramifications of those who followed the blog being recorded as..perishables..there was a side story ,where I began writing Liam as not only the good guy but in a heroic mode that practically shut the system,their system down..never mind when i began writing truly realistically of my family unit..but I must continue on,for if it not me as example as Degenrate Sicko of the raving kind to be a beacon to the troubled Minds in real time,than it will be another sucker who needs some cash for a project they didnt understand the implications of,..but I preceed ,although not quite with a gun pointed to my head ,don't kid yourself..)

(is it presumed that i enjoy writing this horseshit ,this idiotic hobbled babble in predetermined bad grammar,runon sentences,and endless CAPS?as it is presumed that when A Pre Designed Incident occurs (in which I am of course the "criminal".)I will take it Like a "Perishable....a perishable who knows he deserves what he gets.?.there was a scenario early on wherein a well recognized actor pummels me i shit thee not,but I had a difficult time keeping the bizarre key points quite serious enough especially last summer ..the drugs i was given to induce such meanderings somehow faulty.and my heart wasnt in it.but 17 dollars and hour is 17 dollars an hour and i had made a

'we told you to?who told you to?you're delusional?dactology wants nothing to do with any of this.if someone told you to write anti dactile shit I sure would like to know who it was.
"it was you,it was evan and linda N"
"hmmm .maybe,maybe it was the other team."
what other team,"anyway Adam and Evan are concerned
"Adam he's a fucking actor .what does he know"
"he knows what he knows.look at you.,running crazy in the streets of OUR town,serves you right"
"and just why dear was i running crazy in the streets"
"proxy is a tool.those that fear the tool.."
"have you ever been proxed"
"has adam?"
"it's lucky that you have jimbis,it's lucky that we know what we have here.."
"it's my mind I can think whatever i god damn want to."
"you really think this is about acting lessons or virtual reality or a new television.you fucking idiot?it's about a new world,a new way of interacting,it 's political"
"it's a horror show is what it is"
"it's a tool,you are using it wrong,you fear the tool and don't hear the instructions
"oh sister i hear the instructions all right"
"did the instructions tell you to write about it all over the internet "
"yes,is what i'm saying..That 's why i fucking came here.Evan and adam told me to write every key point in the notebooks."
"wha
" a cry for help sister"
"did we help jimbis.I sure hope we arrived in time"
"the things you can do with time with a bit of love potion number nine"
"youre an idiot"

hmmmm...things were getting close.
like
coming together...
the bits and pieces...
dude raised a certain way..
than drugged and shit..
than these certain ways(symbols) are played out.

"there's a plot in there somewhere," I say,"you just have to look for it"

i asked myself what would jesus do in 2012.not if he was 33 but 43 and somehow jumped off the cross.and was called a ego maniac loon or something by his so called friends.especially the scum who crossed him.i mean it was a leap from 33 to 43.things change drastically,those ten years.i swear if you gave him even ten more months even without the cross bizness i think the dude would have went somewhere and written his story himself .just to sell it.just to make some dough especially if he was so into this giving bizness.i sure am not saying i'm no jesus but man have i been put through the ringer.by these people playing god.

 she says"there is a plot in here somewhere"
"OH yes there is a PLOT indeed!" i cried.But i saw the large male nurse begin rising from his chair." a cohesive story line I mean to say ..several in fact"
"for legal reason"she said" we might have to lose the dactology part,'
"Yes .we must lose dactology at any cost!
jesus christ mr bloom you just cant let it go evan chimed.and hear i thought we might have a way out of this fucking blog.
i began shaking,Brenda asked if i was ok.the male nurse i saw from below.he was wearing a dactology pin
"yes.perhaps we can just make dactology ..some other .uh...group..maybe...the"
Brenda spoke,"let's just make them aliens,or maybe the army."
"NO oooooo...lets just keep any group out of it..maybe we can make them dinosaurs,it might be safer."

i can tell you one fucking thing whomever is pulling the strings around here sure as shit has alot more money power and everything than i do,space aliens,etc
was this some morality test.?
where the hell was i supposed to pull this morality out of.?huh
if god came to me,the real thing not this shit he'd be like.well.he'd listen for one
i mean he might not comiserate.
but i dont think he'd keep twisting me around
he'd be like dude you really cant think str8 it might take me like 15 years to see where this bullshit came from and how to undo it
.he wouldnt go all horror show etc..i mean think of it when like adam first heard god booming he must have been like oh no oh no oh no
than if god was like reading his mind which i presume he could.what would adam do
what if his thoughts were adhd or unpleasant etc.
was he supposed to be like ok god.(stop) I will mend my ways (stop)or would his mind be like fuck fuck fuck i'm freezing and this eve needs food ..or oh fuck evee im not even into her ,than god might be real pissed and he'd be like sorry sorry sorry.but imagine if he wasnt sorry and god knew it than hed have to spend like all this energy somehow running away from his true thought and still be hungry and still have to interneural with god who he knew could like turn him into dust

i asked myself what would jesus do in 2012.not if he was 33 but 43 and somehow jumped off the cross.and was called a ego maniac loon or something by his so called friends.especially the scum who crossed him.i mean it was a leap from 33 to 43.things change drastically,those ten years.i swear if you gave him even ten more months even without the cross bizness i think the dude would have went somewhere and written his story himself .just to sell it.just to make some dough especially if he was so into this giving bizness.i sure am not saying i'm no jesus but man have i been put through the ringer.by these people playing god.
I considered her analysis.I had read in screenwriting books to all but curtsie to studio types.
"schizophrenia has it's drawbacks i'm afraid .it is not very linear.."
i have a bit of a jump cut mind."
"so I have noticed "she said"but there is something to this..I must say"
,i had sent several copies of Small life Video and wallhangings to Fox,Paramount and New line studios
only Fox had gotten back to me as well as a fledgling independent tv studio in India.it wasnt exactly a bidding war but I was impressed that brenda had made the trip to Pennsylvania
"it's a treatment,very "tree of Life "if you read it correctly ,There is a section actually, about dinosaurs but I didnt want to "overpost"
i wasnt supposed to post at all.at first it was me just thinking it was a muse or something .when i was still in sherman oaks,but than it got all poltergeistish.bossing me around.getting veryserious,bringing in this entire damien lewis subplot that was beyond belief.
i can tell you one fucking thing whomever is pulling the strings around here  sure as shit has alot more money power and everything than i do,space aliens,etc
was this some morality test.?
where the hell was i supposed to pull this morality out of.?huh
if god came to me,the real thing not this shit he'd be like.well.he'd listen for one
i mean he might not comiserate.
but i dont think he'd keep twisting me around
he'd be like dude you really cant think str8 it might take me like 15 years to see where this bullshit came from and how to undo it
.he wouldnt go all horror show etc..i mean think of it when like adam first heard god booming he must have been like oh no oh no oh no
than if god was like reading his mind which i presume he could.what would adam do
what if his thoughts were adhd or unpleasant etc.
was he supposed to be like ok god.(stop) I will mend my ways (stop)or would his mind be like fuck fuck fuck i'm freezing and this eve needs food ..or oh fuck evee im not even into her ,than god might be real pissed and he'd be like sorry sorry sorry.but imagine if he wasnt sorry and god knew it than hed have to spend like all this energy somehow running away from his true thought and still be hungry and still have to interneural with god who he knew could like turn him into dust"there is a plot in here somewhere"
"OH yes there is a PLOT indeed!" i cried.But i saw the large male nurse begin rising from his chair." a cohesive story line I mean to say ..several in fact"
"for legal reason"she said" we might have to lose the dactology part,'
"Yes .we must lose dactology at any cost!
jesus christ mr bloom you just cant let it go evan chimed.and hear i thought we might have a way out of this fucking blog.
i began shaking,Brenda asked if i was ok.the male nurse i saw from below.he was wearing a dactology pin
"yes.perhaps we can just make dactology ..some other .uh...group..maybe...the"
Brenda spoke,"let's just make them aliens,or maybe the army."
"NO oooooo...lets just keep any group out of it..maybe we can make them dinosaurs,it might be safer."

"not really kiddo "she said signalling the nurse,who reached for a hypo,"I think most of your problems truly began when you refered to Bernie as a dinosaur"
I had not thought of Bernie for sometime.I had never reread small life video and wallhangings.
the Muralist was having a fine time indeed.
i woke up sweating.but happy i wasnt in restrainsts .but i knew more and more i always would be


hmmmm...things were getting close.
like
coming together...
the bits and pieces...
dude raised a certain way..
than drugged and shit..
than these certain ways(symbols) are played out.

 all fictionhmmmmmm
.ah thank god he was schizophrenic
imagine .that this was all true,
proxy.or what proxy symbolizes.
thing is.
would it matter to this dude that they did it to.
it wasnt his experiment.
if they wanted him hushed theyd give him money.or a house or something they like owe this guy big time.they like stole his life...

fuck you .
i can tell you one fucking thing whomever is pulling the strings around here and in 94 sure as shit has alot more money power and everything than i do,space aliens,etc
was this some morality test.?
where the hell was i supposed to pull this morality out of.?huh
if god came to me,the real thing not this shit he'd be like.well.he'd listen for one
i mena he mioght not comiserate.
but i dont think he;d keep twisting me around
he'd be like dude you really cant think str8 it might take me like 15 years to see where this bullshit came from and how to undo it.he wouldnt go all horror show etc..i meaN  think of it when like adam first heard god booming he must have been like oh no oh no oh no
than if god was like reading his mind which i presume he could.what would adam do
what if his thoughts were adhd or unpleasant etc.
was he supposed to be like ok god.(stop) I will mend my ways (stop)or would his mind be like fuck fuck fuck i'm freezing and this eve needs food ..or oh fuck evee im not even into her ,than god might be real pissed and he'd be like sorry sorry sorry.but imagine if he wasnt sorry and god knew it than hed have to spend like all this energy somehow running away from his true thought and still be hungry and still have to interneural with god who he knew could like turn him into dust.what did this dude have to go on?
truely
some wackos who would suggest things to him?
voices in his head?
the fact that he was back where he started you see
besides being absurd.
cuz WHY was HE EVER here.
than he remembers why the hell did any of this happen?
really
just how much control of any of this did this guy have
than he knows he's insane
just blaming
nobody woulda made up so tedius a scenario
i mean this aint exactly the truman show
but than i remember that the truman show was boring.
or boring for jim cary
but it waSNT LIKE CREEPY BORING
i lead a life of creeping and creepy boring
it has made me creepy i think
there arent many creeps out and about like the ones you'd see in movies of the 50's and 60s
like those crazy eyed spooky,types that dont seem to haver much control of a jumpy leg or jumpy jump demeanor.
I have that look. though
and it isnt retro.
it's creepy/and dont say i give myself too much credit
i also see and hear shit
i have this one down man.i cant see other people emulating it like this move to wear sandals
in fact this dude was so shafted from this bullshit that he despised it's assemblers.CEOs or whatever(armynavymarineetcwho gave ashit) to a degree unimagininable if he were to go further and further into it.and he needed to cuz this dude yousee was so stupifying physically and mentally fucked by his 43rd year that said dude had nothing but the story
schizophrenia his ass.and if it wasnt
what in fuck's name was it
space aliens
the illuminati.
what the fuck was the illuminati anyway.Reptile people.he had looked it up online and still had no idea.
also he had looked up so many different things.from the star wars space program(possibly the funds shifted to begin ..some type of..)
oh jesus
he had never read a sci fi book in his life.even the hobbit got thrown across the room
was the hobbit sci fi or fantasy
what i needed was a boyfriend screenwriter with some type of organic head trauma.someone who would be easy to eat with
something like that but definitely a screenwriter type who said shut up i'm thinking alot.
we would go head first into this project.
we would probably break up early but be so commited to the finished project that we would remain in the same town
and we would also begin working out together.not to be buff.but because it helped oygen flow to our heads
because we would both need to be sober
me more than him cause proxy tells me