my mom who knows without knowing has said jimmy be careful what u write.especially when u are angry.a.i am not angry.my friends feed me and give me coffee at this house there is koeringthisand kohlthat and hunterfans and food from wholefoods and fireplaces that work and this friend hates smalltalk and while he assumes i am vaguely insane and always has only asks that i not wear shoes in the hous eor scream down from the balcony to the people that only wealthy people jog and poor people walk out of neccesity etc.
the damien lewis problem although probably simply a interneural simulation has thrown this jotting into a tailspin.i must get more serious.but i also dwell a bit on why him.for i have been told that evrything matters .and that is best to write this again 3 ways if i am to write at all.a.as a grand delusion.b.as a technological simulation.and c.as  simply an alien type experience.a mystical friend has suggested that since our minds are so crammed with jingles and televisied images and "personalities" that any foreighn species might be very confused indeed knowing what thought of ours are "in reality" or "on TV" but it might be a good idea to maybe not write this dude's name(as if there are not other people named damien lewis besides this damien lewis actor man)

i think however he represents "m y type"these days if i see a red head i look again.a tiny swoosh goes thru me.and never moreso than at the van nuys jail.i am attracted to cops and men with power especially if it means control of things like locking me in .handcuffs.etc.i want to lay my head on their chest ;;;now let me explain a bit that soon only cops and these people will matter.but i wont get into that....its complicated.this new world bizness.for there must be control and i dont really think that is something that will be automatic .it wont be lord of the flies.no way.no alpha male shit this time.not for things to come.they speak too loud  for one these braggart types we so adore leading us  by our chains and their arrogance makes foriegner and more poweful entities (so calle dspace aliens)sick...not to mention the hand that rocks the technology.the scientists(who perhaps are in KAHOOTS with,even some "ology" type "religions I am told.hmmm...did u know even those nazi type scientists in the 1940s and those brought over like project papaer clip/boys from brazil style in the 1950''s wore glasses ,were rather thin and didnt pump up much jams at frat parties.
and good cops .even those paid off by agency and such.know that what comes next while not NICE will be based on an earthly love sooo powerful and sweet (it will encourage and instigate the trees and plants u see to produce DMT SENSO) ..you know .that "meek shall inherit stuff"{ but for real.and the alpha male u see(who has destroyed life on earth i n only a few hundred years .will be eaten by the birds and the bees.plus many many actors and television executives who have polluted the minds of the masses knowingly for years.