I don't know what in fuck's name THEY were expecting
from my Neurals.
what would they
think of yours
at any givem moment..
.
asperger's they call it now
when i was a kid
it was just called autism
my dad told the teachers were all in a jumble
since i was a tiny kid about this
not being there shit..
i lived in my own world,
i was gone...
no one likes someone not present
it makes them think you are superior ..
or simply odd.
who cares ya know?
THEY do..
who's they
well they ain't.. what you might think
the obvious thing one might think ...if a guy is goin on and on about
mentors only he hears and sees.
it is what it is..
but if you decide to read on
if you assume i'm writing about imaginary
shit...
thasn don't read at all.
cuz i went to a fuck of alot of trouble mixing in all matter of disclosed documents...concerning the right here right now of psychotronics
well
at first i thought it was a good idea documenting this shit ..granted as ..fiction..
you'd go all fictiony too if you were scared outta your mind
of the escalation of this situation
a good part of the day is fine
fun even..
but never when He's around the main mentor..
who despises me.
who KNOWS i am sick..in a very serious way
these guys work shifts.
this guy has decided
I am expendable.
I always knew this.
but it 's this close now.
i cannot come up with a Good Neural read ,not one that lasts.LIKE A NORMAL person
and this guy has this THING for some kinda normal i didnt know they made anymore.
some old school ideal of
human thought moving always further never backward never,,a cruel thought ...
guy expected this test run to be
like a movie..
but one's mind doesnt work that way
as the very intrusion of it fucks it up..
do i try?
try to think in a way best for intraneural interface..
and the other mind augment shit..
for brief periods of time
yeah
but than you're like OK
bye
but they dont hang up..
cause they need to monitor you 24/7 to get all sorts of neural data and shit..
and there's all sorts of
sciency shit ..like histamines and neural spikes and stuff I don;t care about but they do
mainly you just want
to be alone with your own thoughts
I have a tiny thing in my arm and all sorts of super super tiny things in blood
I used to have to go to a Hematologist..
Is what it is..
it's called an insert
or an App
this shit is the most dangerous shit in the fuckin world
and worth disappearing over
so if i go missing ...
these are the guys I'll be with,the shit they said they'll do...
cutting my ears off ,my tongue.
it's their favorite refrain
.it helps them maybe deal with it on their end
like how i gotta repeat and repeat the purina cat chow commercial to have some distance
at this point
I just want out.
I tried
it didn't work
having never been physically cut to pieces.I can only be scared of things i can relate to
not prolonger physical torture
i am real to them
they are not quite real to me
they are disembodied
no matter how many times they yell it through me..
cut off your ears ,your tongue ,your eyes
what the fuck can i do about it.
i just hope i go into shock or something and die quickly.
.
these guys obviously can do whatever they want..
someone aloowed them to shove shit in my blood.
and inject something into my arm
let's pretend this is fiction
unless i disappear
...
and it has to do with my bad Neurals.
which come off sick...
weird....unfocused,mean,disturbed,...
nobody's supposed to be THERE to begin with
in another's mind
is there anything more unnatural to conceive..
you can't pray
when you're always interfacing .
always linked
and when u do
it's angry
rage
to some entity above the grid
to rip the whole thing down
but who else u gonna pray to?
when someone is
reading your neurals
and what else you gonna truly pray for
that's how fucked up this is..
you people owe me in ways
you can't even speculate...
.i mean there's just so long one can think of unicorns leaping over rainbows isn't there?
my thoughts.
and thus i reckon my Soul
are simply are not
considered RIGHT enough by The Powers that Seize
and certainly
a power that can actually
Get inside One in such a manner
that has been given the Right to Do this
should have the right
to remove such a person
to kill them
it doesn't take a "mind reader" to KNOW this..does it?
i get /
got arrested many times..
it kinda goes hand in hand with being a human puppet.
i mean there's like this resistance ..to being taken over by psychotronic control that seems to be intrinsic
like whom ever made the human species
and i don't think it was Mandlers.
placed some nasty basic instinct into one's very core to
not be taken over or taken in by intrusion except perhaps by Him
now when someone gets arrested
there's supposed to not resist arrest
after being slammed to the ground many times for not just going along with the arrest
i now just put my hands out or roll to the floor.
but it's natural in a way to resist arrest
and one learns this
sometimes the hard way
I mean one knows one has done something to be arrested.
i mean they can't arrest you for simply thinking bad thought.
like they can't arrest you ..not yet at least.
for looking at a glass window and sorta hoping you had a rock in your hand to break it..
why cause sometimes it's
calming to me at least to break something
especially if some THEM or other has decided to play pincushion on your nervous system
and scan one's neural pathways
know what i mean?
may you never...
Ok so if you do something ...some misdemeanor like hooking or smoking j on the street or something
yeah ...u go sorry officer but a guy's gotta make a living or I smoke weed or whatever cause the dr said i could..
and let them cuff you
but suppose they leave the cuffs and leave you in the cop car for ..I don't know a year and a half..
well
i think it becomes OK to scream..and jiggle the cuffs to get out of it
any which way you can
maybe
you find a little computer
and even though your hands are cuffed.
you can type help help help..these people have restrained and detained me for a year and a half..
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