JOSHUAH

it's beginning to sink in.

I have gotten "the line" about why i must "hurry up and split"
intraneural
having really nothing to do with ...
experimentation
as in
selection.
(seems this survival of the fittest shit is "the new way"
and what a mess
has been made in the past four decades with all these.."social adjustments"
....
such sick minds and bodies.
who needs them...

shucks.that i am not the letterman sweater type.
the more I try to "see" things from their point of view
as in
track my own intrinsic
sickness
is that
it triggers my mind to
race through
whatever I have done .or thought .to be considered .such a 'sicko"
these rampant thoughts of self study
(which intra N servs up to them in hi Def)
of
my sickness
further exhibit to THEM
my "perversion of thought"
to be studied
as
specimen(a example.you see....thus the blog)
causes
such demanding (if nebulous) self study for

 

clues of one's "disgustingness" over and over
------------------
Let me digress
for "the search for sicko" also triggers all sorts of Remembrances of Things Past
In regard to what
sickness I have observed in others
for instance
(be careful reading this .for it may slip into your consciousness.and perhaps when you "go for a neural read.or have one "thrust upon you unknowing;y"
this
digression may be taken as your own

                       I remember in the 3rd or fourth grade there was a kid in my class who for whatever reason picked his nose and rubbed the snot on his desk.
i reckon he did this quite visibly  and the teacher called him on it.
telling him he was sick.this behavior
(which indeed it was)

when I am called sick by "my mentors"
and for instance going through my daily grooming.
for instance flossing.
trimming nose hair.plucking a stray eyebrow
they are right there with me
as i am constantly neurally monitored.
I have asked my shrink if schizophrenics speak of such intrusion(I have taken all the tests for such diagnosis.he is on OUR side .as he is a forensic psychiatrist (long story
,,,as we merrily roll along ..through the lush hills of the hollycode hills)
the doc says no
Shucks.
I tell him i wish I had schizophrenia it would be easier than this

Hang in he says
let
them catch
up.
in

 

due time

 

keep daydreaming he says.
and
ADHD your way to Oz